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Telling on myself - my dumbass story

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#1
KRBurke

KRBurke

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So I look at the clock yesterday and see that my lovely wife is snoozing. But it's only 7:30! I figure she's gonna be up by 4:00 going to sleep that early.

Gently I nudge her, softly waking her up with all due care. I say, "Love, you're gonna be up really early if you start sleeping this early."

One eye creeps open and she looks at me.... "You asshole", she says.

I'm a tad befuddled by this. "What do you mean?" I ask.

"It's 7:30 in the MORNING, Kevin. Not at night."

OOOPS. Looks like I fell asleep in my chair...
Kev

Ye Straight Up Bastid (CLB O' TRU BSTDS) :wootdance


"Timid men prefer the calm of despotism to the tempestuous sea of liberty." -- Thomas Jefferson

#2
Kevin Grey

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"A tad befuddled by this?"

You are giving me gems like that and expecting me to commismerate? :laugh:

You get befuddled enough trying to change the blades on your disposable razor. :D

Kevin

ps

A real man would have suggested......."Well since you are up"..................:saevilw:
Bubba Buddha says,

The secrets of the future lie in the past and
what grand lies they can tell.

The secrets of the past determine our future.

To unravel those we must need only master ourselves.

#3
KRBurke

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Ha! Yeah, co-mis-mer-ate with me there, bub! Is that anything like commiserate?

Talk about Gems! Don't worry, though, it's not like pearls were cast before swine. :saevilw:
Kev

Ye Straight Up Bastid (CLB O' TRU BSTDS) :wootdance


"Timid men prefer the calm of despotism to the tempestuous sea of liberty." -- Thomas Jefferson

#4
Aardvark

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I've often wondered: has it ever been attempted, casting the swine first?

#5
rio

rio

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:rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::rof3::tu:, classic

#6
Kevin Grey

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Ha! Yeah, co-mis-mer-ate with me there, bub! Is that anything like commiserate?

Talk about Gems! Don't worry, though, it's not like pearls were cast before swine. :saevilw:


Well duck my sick and call me salty.

Iz you showin sum fight?

I aints got no thyme fer no spewling bee.

This is coming from a guy who can't tell if it is a.m. or p.m.s.. :D

I went and bought a three dollar pair of glasses,
at a flea market and this is the thanks I get. :(

The guy said they were a dollar more because they were tortoise shell.
I thought he meant the rims.:( :D :(

Kevin
Bubba Buddha says,

The secrets of the future lie in the past and
what grand lies they can tell.

The secrets of the past determine our future.

To unravel those we must need only master ourselves.

#7
Mrs_DarkOwl

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Ha, Ha!
Di swearing misspelling bastid (CLB O’ TRU BSTDS)

Co-Owner of DarkOwl Creations, Inc.

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#8
Kevin Grey

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On the serious side.
I have underslept a couple of times.
You wake up full of energy,ready to go like a house on fire.
A quick shower then you sit down for a cup of coffee.
At two thirty in the freaking morning. :(

What can you do? Go back to bed? Not likely even though,
that burst of energy is deflating faster than a sailors pecker,
five minutes after he hits Madam Woo's house of delight and terror. :D

Kevin
Bubba Buddha says,

The secrets of the future lie in the past and
what grand lies they can tell.

The secrets of the past determine our future.

To unravel those we must need only master ourselves.

#9
stevomiller

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I've often wondered: has it ever been attempted, casting the swine first?

Haha, that would be like making a sow's ear out of a silk purse ~ which, it's been proclaimed, I am skilled at!
KR, you stepped in it with both feet, then promptly put them in your mouth!
We are brothers at heart, tho. I have got up, made coffee for my wife, and gently woken her up :"You'll be late for work hunny, time to get up". With her reply "&uckin' gawdamit, it's my day off, what is the matter with you?! "
[I]"All the time you spend tryin' to get back what's been took from you there's more goin' out the door. After a while you just try and get a tourniquet on it". -Cormac McCarthy-
"Got tight on absinthe last night. Did knife tricks." -Hemingway-[I]

#10
il bruche

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Do you ever fall asleep on a late afternoon and wake up after dark you don't know what god damn day it is?

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Study the soul to know the sword. Evil mind, evil sword.



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#11
KRBurke

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Oh yeah, been there.
Kev

Ye Straight Up Bastid (CLB O' TRU BSTDS) :wootdance


"Timid men prefer the calm of despotism to the tempestuous sea of liberty." -- Thomas Jefferson

#12
Baron von Smoogle

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Yep, Did that several times. Woke up put on my uniform got ready to head to the hangar and my wife (also a sailor) looking at me weird when I asked her why she wasn't going in to work. Answer - "Cause it's 7:30 PM ya dingbat!"
Ye Orgnl Assholic, rude, crude, lewd and down right socially unacceptable Bastd (CLB O’ TRU BSTDS)
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#13
WA Martin

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I worked graveyard at a gas station while going to college. I hated during the winter, waking up at 7:30 and not knowing if I was late for school or early for work.
Wade

Ye Redeemed Bass Singin' Bstd (CLB O’ TRU BSTDS)

But this I know with all my heart,
HIS wounds have paid my ransom.


-Stuart Townend, 'How Deep the Father's Love For Us,' c1995, ThankYou Music




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